Friendships | Be Mine
Friendship
By: Raakin Hossain
I’ve always moved from school to school and never really had an opportunity to bond with any individual like some people do. Especially as the holiday season creeps upon us at the global level, everyone shares their plans on having family and friendship reunions. It makes me wonder to what extent these relationships truly reach and what it means to be a friend and whether or not these relationships truly exist. For starters, I’m sure it’s more than just clicking that “Accept Friendship” button on Facebook. I asked a few friends and classmates their opinion on the matter.
“I do believe friends exists. Friends can help you when you are struggling with life stresses such as school or family. Furthermore, friends are there to prevent you (or at least try to) from making idiotic decisions that could potentially threaten your life. A friend is like an adviser, only that adviser cares about your personal well-being.”
- Trevor Mills, 15.
“A friend is a person someone can rely on. A person that when i need, will be there for you. A person who you can count on to help you through the bad and good times. Someone who wont let you down for materialistic things, who will put you above all else (besides family). a person to care for, and cares for you.”
- Michael Guerrero, 16.
Taken from the whiteboard in my bedroom using an iTouch
“It’s when you care for someone more than you should and you put up with their crap because being with them makes you happy. Everyone has crap. If you’re willing to put up with someone’s, that means you’re their friend.”
- Mustafa Mustafa, 18.
“People you will miss. People who you would be willing to sacrifice something for. It’s someone you can have lot of fun with buy will also listen intently when you need someone to talk to. And you can be truthful and tell them “your outfit is ugly today.” And it’s someone you can act naturally around and not feel like you don’t have to be something you’re not.”
- Gina Horiuci, 18.
“I believe they do exist. A friend is a kind of abstract concept. It’s someone you share a bond with, have shared life experiences with, someone who you would risk something for whether it be life and limb or something less.”
- Basil Huffman, 27.
In the common dictionary definition, we are able to classify all our acquaintances as “friends.” Any decent individual would make an attempt to assist you in “your time of need.” As fellow citizens, neighbors, or whatever relationship, we make sacrifices for each other, small or large.
However, people perceive friends to be something beyond that level. We have expectations from our friends, mainly that they’ll stand by our side no matter which Hitler-figure knocks on our door.
Sure, you can rely on a friend to hand you notes for a couple classes you missed. You can even ask to sleepover at their house a couple days, maybe even a few weeks, until you’re able to stand up on your own two feet. For the most part, a friend is someone whom you’ve broken the ice at an uncommon level.
As children, we’re able to form friendships much easier since we all have a common interest: nothing. Our voice begins to evolve and we also have abnormal growth spurts, our personal opinions begin to appear. The scope of our friendship criteria become narrower and narrower with age. Those childhood friends become either once-upon-a-time or just someone we slap on a “hey, wassup” every few months on their Facebook walls for memory’s sake.
Then the factors of time and personal interests appear. Friendships are based on individualistic needs, whether you admit it or not. Very rarely, if ever, will you find an altruistic person in its truest meaning. In reality, you can’t expect a friend to put you above their own spouse and children.
Most importantly, I believe in God and prayer. I also believe in secret benefactors, caring souls, generous individuals, and righteous people in general. We seek to attribute these characteristics in our own “friends.” But a friendship is meant to be mutual. To form a sincere relationship, both parties are required to make equal or similar sacrifices.
But then again, if you limit your expectations and take all necessary precautions, perhaps you can have friendships. Friends are like flowers. If you pick them, they’ll rot in due time. The beauty is meant to be appreciated at some distance.
What’s my opinion on friendship? I’m a neutral. If they exist, then I’m yet to find one.
Disclaimer: For some reason, I feel this topic is incomplete. There is so much to mention, but the post has already exceeded beyond the length wherein I feel reader will feel intimidated to enjoyably read. There’s matters which I left for another time. I’m yet to discuss the terms “best friend”, “true friend”, “facebook friend”, etc. Either way, I’d appreciate if you posted in a comment your own thoughts of what I’ve shared with you.
Curve Ball
Curve Ball
By: Raakin Hossain
Mathematically speaking, life is not a linear or exponential graph. Rather, it’s more like a scatter-plot. Setbacks and obstacles in the course of life are an inevitable and unexpected occurrence for us all. We plan our lives only to the extent of our human capacity. If you observe from the spiritual perspective, setbacks are actually a divine hand urging you forward. And now that we’ve established the inevitable nature of a setback, it would be essential to mention solutions for the problem.
Whether the setback was a personal error or simply the flow of life, it should not be considered a failure. The manner you perceive a setback is what will eventually define your improvement and productivity. This is even the rule of business economics. The bulls and bears of the stock market can only be predicted to a certain extent. That’s why, if you take a closer look at your American quarter, engraved in it are the words “In God We Trust.”
Here is a setback of a setback: seeking sympathy. There is nobody in this world that can provide you with earnest comfort and solace. Nor is that a pessimistic thought. Rather, take a personal responsibility of standing up on your mental capability inherited within you. There are times when you’ll feel like you’ve reached the point of no return, which is in reality your last breath of life. Until then, the world and all that it contains is at your disposal, either through a click of a mouse or a loss of a brain cell.
Of course things can never truly result in the way we desire it. There are such things as environmental factors which shape our individual paths. Recognize and learn to be content with the overlooked aspects of life. There are a list of actions performed throughout the day which can be your relaxation point. Instead of grabbing a granola bar on-the-run, organize your schedule to create just a couple more minutes for a calm breakfast. Nothing can be enjoyed through hastiness, as it is a quality of the irrational and incompetent. People who cannot produce quality attempt to conceal it through speed.
Consoling yourself with the I’m-cursed attitude is your one way ticket to absolute failure. As Henry Ford once said, “whether you think you can or can’t, you’re probably right.” When Professor Lupin revealed his werewolf problem, what did James Potter call it? For those Harry Potter freaks much like myself, he called it “a furry little problem.” It’s an attitude known as optimistic and positivity; two words worth writing onto your whiteboard or engraving onto your Apple product. [Not a paid advertisement. Though, Steve Jobs, if you're reading this, send me a check.]
Setbacks do affect our outlook on life, whether we like it or not. However, admitting it to our self-esteem will result on an inferiority complex. Don’t sweat the small stuff, as they say. Simply aim upward to the larger picture, your ambition.
Sometimes, we open our pantries and complain, “there’s nothing to eat in the house.” Yet, I remember when I visited Bangladesh nearly a decade ago, there was a child with only a cloth tied around his waist and had obviously not taken a bath in ages, playfully smiling in my direction. For some reason, that’s one of those few memories that happen to carry on til today and I sincerely hope it never escapes me. Compare it to that, belittling my so-called troubles should not be a difficult task.
Learn to accept whatever comes your way and consider them as leaps of faith. Things often will not turnout the way we want it, no matter how much we push and shove. Take the best out of not only the situation, but squeeze every last drop of juice left in life. And believe me, there is plenty of that to go around. When life throws you a curve ball, go hit a home run.
* This article has not been edited yet. I posted it anyway, and I’d definitely appreciate your feedback and thoughts.
Criticizing and Constructive Criticism
We are all critiques by the natural state of a human being. When we typically meet someone for the first time, our subconscious mind takes a brief check up on the person based off of appearance. Our eyes scan the style of dress and etiquette. Thereafter, we quickly categorize them according to whatever standard or measurement we normally use.
An interviewer, for example, will first notice the interviewee’s nails and teeth. While he’s casually throwing you questions, he’s also performing his own airport-security-like body scan with his eyes. For those of us who’ve been to any form on interview know that those scans are like lasers piercing through your body.
As The Days Fly By | Crossing Paths
As we grow older, we lose connections. The best friend in sixth grade becomes a distant stranger just a couple years down the line and so the cycle of life continues. The new environment and life’s inevitable changes overpower us. Whether we like them or not, they are forced upon us and thus, we gain experience.
However, you do cross paths on occasion. There’s been many friends I’ve lost but I’ve regained connection with a couple. Our interaction is based on the Internet and technology but there is still a mutual communication.
The only friends that last are not those whom you have spent more time with. The only friends that last are not those whom you have closer blood relation towards. Rather, the only friends that last are those whom you have competed towards good and righteousness with.
I make such a claim only through personal experience. I’ve had people whom I’ve known since the first two years of my life. Yet, those friends have been long gone. Though, it’s a fact of life that things pass on. There’s an Arab proverb, to the effect, “When age had increased, his beloveds have passed on.”
It’s a matter of accepting that fact and moving on.
The Unwritten Code and Ethics of Business | Part One: E-mails Vs Letters
I wouldn’t consider myself a professional in the field of business or marketing, but it is something I hope to pursue in the near future. I’ll simply share a few pointers now and then regarding business for the greater benefit.
First of all, we all receive spam mail inevitably. As annoying as it gets to click the checkboxes for deletion, we routinely do it every day. Otherwise, if the e-mail is from a friend, it holds little importance such that we skim through it and send a couple words in response. Sometimes we even have a list of standard responses we provide clients and employees. These types of communications are emotionless, like talking to those automated phone systems. They try to delay your interaction with a living being for as long as possible.
Observe Your Peers
I’m going to write this post using business as the primary example. There is always good to be derived from every source. We cannot let our pride overtake us in that aspect, or we shall never be able to succeed. Remember that everyone in this world has something to offer us and never undermine what you learn as it can serve a purpose one day.
In the world of business, this is quite relevant and a key to success. You observe those who are at the same level as you and see how they function as an organization. What makes them who they are? What are their key features? What is unique about them? When you gather that information, you may rephrase them in your own organization. The most successful and preferable method would be, however, to use your notes as an idea to create something unique with your own business. If you really do not have a creative mind, attempt to collaborate the ideas from various peer organizations and start yourself from there. It’s like writing. Once you get the first sentence down, it begins to flow.
About Me
I'm your Muslim-American-Born-Teenager, but I'm far from being average or typical. I consider myself adventurous, but not in the sense that I'll go hunting for tigers in the rainforests of India (isn't that where you find tigers?) or attempt bungee jumping off the Empire State Building. Rather, my definition for adventure is to challenge myself in spiritual betterment...as monkish or Mullah Hullah as that may sound. But it really is an interesting adventure in its own weirdly and bewitched way. >Read More...
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